Hate all the new year’s resolutions weight loss mumbo jumbo. It’s almost impossible for us liberal women to lose weight! Liberal men are just plain higher in calories. Here’s proof:

She can eat all she wants
and never gain an ounce.

Virginity chose her.

and then there’s the male side of things…


Haagen Dazs Vanilla Bean. 290 calories per half cup.


Banana Cream. 610 calories per 1/6 pie.


Creme Brulee. 400 calories per half cup (35 fat grams and worth every one).

H/T to Attaturk for the Time/Warner Colbert photo.

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